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Bargain debasements at eBay-style bordello

Shukan Asahi Geino June 18
Shukan Asahi Geino June 18
“Married women in their 50s are extremely popular with single men in their 30s,” says the manager at “Ikebukuro Used Car Center.”

You won’t be able to kick the tires or toot the horn of its merchandise, however, since there are no vehicles on the lot. Rather, it’s the name of an out-call sex service that specializes in married or divorced jukujo (mature women). The photos and body measurements of over 50 are posted on its site.

The name of the shop poses an interesting analogy. Is looking over a woman like inspecting a good used car? Maybe you prefer the lines of a certain year’s model, with its prominent headlamps or bulging tail fins. Or maybe you just like to sit behind the wheel and smell the upholstery, so to speak.

In addition to selections from the menu, each day, reports Shukan Asahi Geino (June 18), at least one of its ladies is placed on auction block. Registered members then bid for her services, effectively making it an eBay-style bordello.

Check it out here.

If the same services were to be procured in the conventional manner, a romp with one such lady at a love hotel would come to at least 16,000 yen. But if you bide your time and place your bids astutely, you can enjoy the thrill of a bargain debasement, so to speak.

Asahi Geino’s reporter watches the deadline approach on bids for a gal named Mai, age 45, and he closes with a winning bid at 12,500.

“Actually,” she confides soon afterwards in a hotel room after they’ve disrobed, “The first penis I ever sucked belonged to a man I didn’t know.”

“I spread my labia open and let him look at it.”

“What did he say to you?” the reporter asked.

“He said it was moving inside.”

“Can I look too?”

“Now, you mean?

“Well after all, with a used car you’re supposed to lift the hood and check out the engine,” the reporter replies.

While inspecting the merchandise, he also noted that oil seemed to be leaking from Mai’s motor.

Hazukashii,” she blushes, in the standard Japanese expression of modesty and/or shame.

“My husband doesn’t care about me at all,” Mai tells the reporter after his test-drive. “For more than 20 years now we haven’t kissed, nor have I touched his penis.”

Well, concludes Asahi Geino, some classic cars might give greater satisfaction than a shiny new model that has yet to be broken in. But you have to expect that some will inevitably show signs of wear and tear. (K.S.)

Source: “Jukujo ookushon! Hote-heru de shirotozuma wo,” Shukan Asahi Geino ( June 18, pages 192-193)

Note: Brief extracts from Japanese vernacular media in the public domain that appear here were translated and summarized under the principle of “fair use.” Every effort has been made to ensure accuracy of the translations. However, we are not responsible for the veracity of their contents. The activities of individuals described herein should not be construed as “typical” behavior of Japanese people nor reflect the intention to portray the country in a negative manner. Our sole aim is to provide examples of various types of reading matter enjoyed by Japanese.